How to help your child when they lose their first tooth

At a glance

• The first baby teeth usually come out around the age of 6, but every child has their own pace.
• Let the tooth come out on its own with gentle wiggling. Don't pull it.
• While the tooth is very loose, offer softer food.
• Tell your child the tooth is making room for a new one and that it usually doesn't hurt much.
• Keep a simple, predictable tradition: a little box, a photo of the gappy grin, a story.

When do children lose their first tooth?

Most children lose their first baby tooth around the age of 6, and some a little earlier or later.

The first to wobble are usually the bottom front teeth. The tooth starts to move little by little as the grown-up tooth grows underneath and takes its place. It can take a few days or a few weeks before it comes out.

It isn't a race. If a classmate has already lost two teeth and your child hasn't lost any, that's perfectly normal. The timing varies a lot from child to child. If you have questions about your child's pace, ask the dentist at the next check-up.

For a child, the first wobbly tooth can be a mix of pride and unease. It's a sign they're growing, but it's also something strange in their mouth that moves when it shouldn't. Explain it simply: "This baby tooth is packing its bags. Underneath, there's a new big-kid tooth waiting."

Should I pull out a wobbly tooth?

A wobbly tooth is best left to come out on its own, without pulling, because a tooth that isn't ready can hurt and bleed more.

Your child can wiggle it gently with their tongue or a clean finger, if they want to. That helps. But don't force it, and don't let them force it either.

A few ideas for the wobbly days:

• Softer food. Thin apple slices instead of a whole apple, bread without a hard crust, yoghurt, soups.
• Gentle brushing. Keep brushing twice a day, carefully around the loose tooth.
• Reassurance. Tell them it usually doesn't hurt much, and that when the tooth is ready it almost falls out by itself.
• No pressure. Don't ask ten times a day whether it's come out yet. Let them decide if they want to talk about it.

When the tooth comes out there may be a little blood. A clean piece of gauze held gently on the gum for a few minutes usually helps.

What if my child swallows the tooth?

If your child swallows a baby tooth, it's usually nothing to worry about: the tooth is very small and passes through the body naturally.

It happens quite often, especially when a tooth comes out during a meal or in their sleep. Often the harder part is for the child, who may be sad that there's no tooth to put in the box.

What you can do:

• Stay calm. Your child is watching how you react.
• Tell them: "Your tooth has gone on a journey through your tummy. Don't worry."
• If you have a tradition, keep it anyway. Your child can write or draw a note about the missing tooth.
• If you're worried, or your child is coughing, struggling to breathe or seems to be in pain, get medical advice straight away.

How do we celebrate the first lost tooth?

The first lost tooth is best celebrated with a simple, warm and predictable tradition that focuses on growing up rather than on presents.

Every family has its own customs. Some children put the tooth under the pillow for the Tooth Fairy, some keep it in a special little box, others have a ritual passed down from their grandparents. They're all good.

A few ideas:

• A tooth box. Your child can decorate it themselves.
• A photo of the gappy grin. Years from now you'll both love it.
• A tooth record. Write down the date and which tooth came out. Add a line with each new one.
• A story. A story about the first wobbly tooth helps your child understand what's happening and feel proud.

Keep the tradition small and easy to repeat. There will be another tooth, and another, and big promises of money or gifts can set expectations that are hard to keep up with every tooth.

When should I see a dentist?

See a dentist if a tooth is knocked out by a bump or a fall, if a grown-up tooth grows in behind a baby tooth that stays put, or if teeth become loose very early.

A few situations where it's worth asking the dentist:

• A tooth was knocked, chipped or came out after a fall.
• The new tooth is coming through behind the old one, and the old one isn't moving. Some parents call these "shark teeth".
• A young child, well before the usual age, has a loose tooth without having had a knock.
• The gum is swollen, red or very sore.

Regular dental check-ups are a good moment to ask about anything that's on your mind about baby teeth and grown-up teeth.

Step by step

1. When you notice a wobbly tooth, talk to your child calmly and simply about what's happening.
2. Explain that a new tooth is growing underneath and this is how it makes room.
3. Let them wiggle the tooth gently, only if they want to, with their tongue or a clean finger.
4. Offer softer food while the tooth is very loose.
5. Keep up gentle brushing twice a day.
6. When the tooth comes out, hold clean gauze on the gum for a few minutes if it bleeds.
7. Put the tooth in the box or follow your family's tradition.
8. Take a photo of the new smile and note the date.
9. Praise them for being brave and for how much they've grown.

By age

• Ages 1–3: baby teeth don't usually fall out at this age. If a tooth is lost early or after a knock, ask the dentist.
• Ages 4–5: for most children the teeth aren't wobbly yet. You can prepare with a story and a simple explanation of baby teeth and new teeth. If a tooth becomes loose very early without a knock, ask the dentist.
• Ages 6–8: the first wobbly tooth arrives, then others, sometimes several at once. Explain it simply, never pull, keep brushing gently and mark each one in your tooth record.

Words that help and words to skip

• Try: "Your tooth is making room for a big-kid tooth."

• Try: "When it's ready, it'll almost come out by itself."

• Try: "Look at your brand-new smile!"

• Skip: "Let's just yank it out."

• Skip: scary stories about teeth pulled out with string and a slammed door.

• Skip: "The Tooth Fairy brings a big present for every tooth."

Common mistakes

• Pulling a tooth that isn't ready to come out.
• Scary stories about teeth being pulled, which make children afraid.
• Big promises of money or gifts that set expectations for every tooth to come.
• Comparing your child with siblings or classmates who've already lost teeth.

When to talk to a doctor or psychologist

See a dentist if a tooth is knocked out by a fall, if a grown-up tooth grows in behind a baby tooth that stays put, or if teeth become loose very early.